Aging Well in the Gorge August 25th 2015

Many have commented about getting older. Groucho Marx once said “Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.” George Burns said “You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.” And then there was Mark Twain who expressed his often repeated view on aging, “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.”

Many of us don’t want to think about getting older. But at some point in our lives, we realize we are no longer young men – or women. My brother-in-law is an example. He shared at the last family reunion that now he has turned 70, he can no longer deny he is getting old.

Although we may not feel old, there are unwanted signs reminding us old age has at least moved into the neighborhood. While cleaning out the receptionist desk at the Center, I found hidden in the back reaches of the bottom shelf, a poster describing some of those signs. Here are my top ten favorites describing when you know you are getting old. Maybe you can also relate to them.

1) Everything hurts and what doesn’t hurt doesn’t work. 2) You think gay means “happy, lively, and vivacious”. (Remember the Gay Blade clothing stores?) 3) You know all the answers, but no one asks you the questions. 4) Your mind makes agreements your body can’t keep. 5) Your favorite newspaper column is “20 (or 40) Years Ago Today”. 6) You feel like the morning after and you haven’t been anywhere. 7) Anything under a quarter isn’t worth bending over to pick up. 8) You stop to think and sometimes forget to start again. 9) A dripping faucet (or any running water) causes an uncontrollable bladder urge. 10) You finally get to the top of the ladder, but it’s leaning against the wrong wall.

And finally here are my own observations discovered over the past eight years. 1) When you fly, TSA no longer considers you a high security risk. 2) An elderly woman in Portland was reported hurt and she was 10 years younger that you are. 3) When someone asks for help moving furniture, they look right past you. 4) You turn to the classic rock station and it’s playing 80’s music. And finally, 5) You have no idea who Ashley Madison is and all you want is a good night’s sleep.

“Swiss cheese and Me” update: I’m making progress learning to enjoy the taste of Swiss cheese, but it has had some unexpected consequences. While I was cooking, my wife walked into the kitchen complaining about a terrible smell - of body odor. It wasn’t me or the cumin spice, but the Swiss cheese! She now stays out of the kitchen – at least when I’m cooking with swiss.

Because the Center is installing new floor covering in the lobby, the custom built receptionist’s desk, which has admirably stood the test of time, needs to be moved. But I wanted to make sure as much of the desk would be preserved in the process. So there was no better person to ask than Frank LaRoque who built and installed the desk back in 1987. A big thank-you to Frank and friends for taking the time to modify the desk so it can be still be used.

As I mentioned last week, the Center and Meals-on-Wheels will be closed on Monday the 31^st; but now also on the Tuesday, September 1^st to move back into the lobby the bookshelves and the desk. Although closed, Meals-on-Wheels will still deliver meals on Tuesday.

At the Center on Tuesday, September 1st, the Andre, K.C. and Tom will be performing. Doors open at 6:00, music starts at 7:00, everyone is welcome, and donations are appreciated.

The brilliant, reclusive, and eccentric millionaire who built the H-4 Hercules aircraft (“Spruce Goose”) was Howard Hughes.

This week’s “Remember When” questions was also sent in by Marcia Lacock and is for the car buffs in the audience. There have been twenty-three James Bond movies, and the automobiles in the films were often used to show thrilling car chases and exotic gadgets. What was the make of the car, first seen in Goldfinger in 1964, that is associated with James Bond? Email your answer to mcseniorcenter@gmail.com, leave a message at 541-296-4788 or mail it with a picture of Sean Connery as James Bond.

Well, it’s been another week, just kickin’ down the cobblestones and feeling groovy. Until we meet again, to take time to see the extraordinary in the ordinary.